An Open Letter to Bill Maher 

So I watched your show when Michael Eric Dyson tried to walk you through a real and earnest apology. I was disappointed when he failed to do so. You kept falling back on excuses. “It was a comedic error; you are an animal of comedy.”
Today I went for a run along the lake front in Chicago. The trail is shared by runners and bikers and I noticed that the white bikers passing me from behind, a black woman, didn’t call out and warn that they were passing and left just enough space to safely pass me, even when there was no one at all, running or riding in the oncoming lane of traffic. 
It reminded me of JimCrowSegregation, when black people were required to surrender the sidewalk to any and every white person walking. That it put me in this mindset, when I was born well after Brown v Board of Education, my knowledge of this limited to reading and movies, made me think of collective consciousness and/or cultural memory. Where by an entire community has an emotional reaction to a situation because it is experienced in an historical context. 
If this is the case ,for me as a Black Woman, isn’t it also the case that white males have a collective consciousness and/or cultural memory that they act on when they fail to give a Black runner safe passing space, but do so for a white runner? Which I saw occur twice on my run. The understanding that was a white male, I own the sidewalk and don’t have to give a Black person on the same walkway reasonably safe passing space.
And that is what was missing from your apology for me. That acknowledgement of the privilege enjoyed by you as a white male of being entitled to the whole sidewalk, to use the n-word, the ongoing historical and cultural context and memory. And the atonement for that abuse as one who knows better. Understands bias and systemic racism and micro-aggressions. A sincere unqualified apology. 
This is an opportunity for deeper communication, but we all have our share of heaving lifting to take advantage of this opportunity. 

When Luv Turns to Hate


As many of you know, I’ve been a super-fan, promoter and cheerleader for the blogger-turned-author and influencer, Luvvie Ajayi ,aka Awesomely Luvvie, who rose to great fame and popularity doing ROFL recaps of “Scandal.” She built that into a golden platform, nabbed a book deal that shot to a #1 New York Times bestseller and has been picked up by “Scandal” creator Shonda Rhimes for a TV series.

All through this process, I’ve gleefully shared Luvvie’s posts, witticisms and news of her awesome ascension to the big time. All of which led me to this, a post I really wish I didn’t have to write.

Last night, Luvvie shared a FB post that was not only far less coherent and eloquent than her normal style, but overflowing with passive-aggressive hateration towards quasi-identified but unnamed Black and Mixed-race activists. Here’s her post:

Luvvie Ajayi

Some of us are fighting for freedom…

View original post 2,108 more words

Dee + Karma = whatever bitch!

Here is MY deal.Are you treating me the way that you want to be treated?


can you habdle it when I treat you the way you treat me?

… no?

are we still in relationship?…. if yes
then you are under the age 5 and over the age of 85
if no… your loss.
this is my standard and I apply it to all relationships. I apply it relations between peoples and nations. 
Did you treat the other like SHIT for a period of time, but your feelings are hurt when KARMA bites you in the ass and you get treated like shit?
this is my take on privilege…


Maybe We Do Need White History Month or Millennials Don’t Know Shit About Slavery or Picking Appropriate Essay Topics or Being a Black English Adjunct Sucks Sometimes–Merry Christmas

The Bluest i

So, I have to go with the salutation that one of my favorite IG personalities, Jill Is Black, often uses in the opening of her videos–

Dear White People–

And then I have to say something touchy, that I almost regret, but not quite because it’s necessary–

Please get your kids.

If you are a Boomer with a Millennial kid or grandkid, or an Xer with a Millennial kid, I’m begging you. For his own good. Get him.

Explain to his little ass that while slavery did allow White America to amass tremendous wealth during the two-plus centuries of its operation, which, in turn, allowed America to become a global superpower, submitting an essay entitled “Slavery Changed America for the Better” that does not approach that idea from an economic standpoint solely is problematic as hell.

Could you–just–for me? Please?

I literally just read the following in a…

View original post 1,342 more words

Things I know now

Words I wish my mother had said to me. It’s not that you bring too much to the table, its that you bring so much to the table! 

And knowing what you bring to the table means you don’t sit down at every single table you pass. 

Some tables just aren’t worth it, they can’t hold everything that you bring,

 so you don’t even bother to sit down.  

you keep going until you find a table that is big enough and strong enough and grand enough to hold all of the things that you bring to the table! 

And then if you feel like it, sit down and share what you have and who you are and if you don’t feel like it, don’t sit or don’t share what you have and who you are, don’t do anything you don’t want to do. 

But don’t ever think that you were too much anything because you are the personification of perfection


So. Here and now. I honored her traditions. Head bowed and eyes closed I said her sacred words. 

So. Here and now I honor my tradition. Head high and screaming fiercely.

Summoning ancestors. Uppity negress bitches. Prepare for the return of a warrior. 

I held her hand and thanked her for years of sacrifice. Lifetimes of putting others first. 

Eons of appropriate if not heart felt choices. 
Years of silently stoically resisting oppression. 
“Do you” I whispered. “We are good” I said. “Take care of you” was mouthed as a single tear fell on to her forehead. Followed by lipstick lip prints. “Thank you for more than I even know”
Then for a second. I thought she focused her eyes on my face. And the moment passed. 

The moment passed. 
Good bye. 

Calling Bullshit

Calling bullshit on All Lives Matter is very difficult because those who need that want to ignore inequality in society. 
Cognitive dissonance, white privilege and ignorance is a hellacious cocktail. 
Fundamentally, those who spout All Lives Matter in response to demands for change, is a plea to maintain the status quo. Whatever else they fear the loss of whatever unfair advantage they enjoy. 

A level playing field doesn’t help everyone or so they think. 

Just as the Blue Lives Matter advocates demand the right to engage in police brutality in the same breath that they demonize those who call for the end of police brutality.  

Who in their right mind opposes a movement that demands justice and an end to murder? How is that a hate group? What type of person supports murder?